Restaurant Review - Lovey's BBQ

Whenever I am driving down Marion, I would always notice the new (and only) Southern BBQ place in Winnipeg, Lovey's BBQ. Always thinking to drop in and pick up some pulled pork, or some ribs, I just never did. I would always be driving home for supper after work, and there would usually already be a supper plan, so my desire for delicious BBQ meat would go unfulfilled.
Finally, one night last week, I had my wits about me enough to call ahead to Tannis to arrange that I pick up some wood smoked bovine and ovine delicacies. As well as enough slaw and beans to make sure our intestines didn't shut down completely.

I was impressed by the decor. It is not at all spectacular, but exactly what I would expect from a BBQ joint. Sheet metal siding wainscotted walls, chalk menus on the walls, pictures of other similarly named and and annointed BBQ establishments that were obviosly taken by the owner during his fact finding tour prior to opening his own joint, and the requisite effigies of the source of the raw materials...pigs.

Although it was the supper hour, I had my order taken quickly. After looking over the various choices (ribs, chicken, brisket, sides) the proprietor and I decided that the 3 meat combo would be the best bet. For 30.00, I had 6 ribs, about a half pound of pulled pork (or option brisket), a half BBQ'd chicken, a couple small squares of corn bread (option was bannock), fries, beans, and some slaw. There was another potato option, I think mashed, but I can't remember.
While I waited, I wandered around the restaurant looking at the various photographs and kitcsh that festooned the walls. My final read was the restaurant reviews by the Press and the Sun. In my opinion, Marion Warhaft is inconsistent with my tastes, and the girl that does the review in the Sun must be either poisoned or clubbed by the waiter before she does a bad review. But as I read these reviews, especially the Free Press one, I noticed how...well...shitty it was. Even though, as I said, Marion and myself are often at odds, I was hoping for something more encouraging from her review. You see, BBQ is basic, primal food. Most of the menu items are prepared well in advance of serving. So, it's not as if you have the same order freshness management concerns as, say, Oriental takeout. Most of the items in my order were put on the smoke 3-10 HOURS before I ever darkened the door of Lovey's. So it would seem to me at least that so long as you have solid proven recipies for the preparation of these dishes, you're golden.

Not so.

I'll truncate the pliagiarism of Ms. Warhaft's review to say it was non-complimentary on most every count. Not to be discouraged, when my order was ready, I excitedly grabbed my two sacks of meat and sauce and headed for the car. I felt my biggest challenge now was getting the works home without eating half of it on the way.

I somehow managed to make it in the house with the original fold still in place on my paper sacks. The family wouln't be home for an hour, so I decided now was the time to sample the wares at their freshest. The following are my findings in the order of their ingestion:

1) Corn Bread - It was definitely NOT my intention to sample the corn bread first, but I had little choice. It was packed on top of the menu item I was originally going for, but more on that later. As I lifted it up, it crumbled to pieces. I caught as much as I could, but it got pretty messy. I decided that the best place to store the remaining pieces was in my mouth. The taste was too spicy for my palate. I was hoping for a sweeter product. Instead, I got savoury. And dry. Like a dusty corn fart.

2) Chicken - Looked wonderful. The texture was good. Nice and tender with a slight crust. The meat was well seasoned, not at all salty, and the smoke flavour had made it all the way through. I did note, however, that this was not the meatiest of birds. Perhaps she was raised on the corn bread, and like me, never developed a taste for it.

3) Fries - Wanting to cleanse my palate of my first meat sample of the night, I decided to dig in to one of the side dishes. What do you want me to say here? They're fries. Real ones, made from potatoes. Good.

4) Pulled Pork - It is pretty damn hard to screw up pulled pork. And they didn't. It was good. I prefer mine a little less pulled than what I got. It would be nice if a few half-inch sized pieces were in there. They would stay a bit moister. But the flavour was very nice.

5) Beans - More palate cleansing. Although after trying a forkfull of these, I was regretting not having chosen to lick the dog. These beans were barely a step below crunchy. And the flavour was far too intense. This was evidently a new batch. Perhaps a few more hours in the crock and some molasses. Yes. That is all I will say about that.

6) Slaw - In an effort to get past my relationship with the beans, I jumped right in bed with her best friend. This is one dish that could have used a bit more flavor. Salt. Corriander. Malt vinegar. Something. But pretty good.

7) Ribs - Cue the trumpets! I left the ribs till last in the hopes that...well...they were yummy. Flavour - good. Texture - poor. Value - meh. I prefer my ribs to be able to be removed from the bone. And if you need to err on one side or the other, a slightly overcooked rack is better than a tough one. And considering the tenacity with which these sinewy morsels were clinging to the bone, I was left wondering if this animal, too was raised on the aforementioned cornbread.

So that covers it. Overall, the value would have been OK if the food had been a bit better. It's not BAD food. But ... ok here's the deal: If you're going to run a BBQ restauant, you really only need to do one thing right...BBQ. Everything else is details. And my ribs are better. It's hard for me to see past that. Maybe I should look at opening my own place...naw, people are to critical. ;)